The ponytail

We deal with some pretty crazy behaviors from Hailey in the morning...The more we react, the stronger and crazier they become.  So we try to ignore them the best we can..."WE" meaning the adults in the household (oh wait, I'm the only adult here 4 days a week!!).

Try getting a 4 year old to ignore her 10 year old sister pulling her hair or touching her arm or taking her juice or biting her eggs or snatching her teddy...or generally driving her crazy.

It is IMPOSSIBLE and the more the 4 year old screams, the more the 10 year old does...A crazy crazy start to the morning.

So I am trying something new...It is working so far although I have no illusions that it will be effective more than a couple of weeks.

Hailey is obsessed with having a ponytail in her hair.  Not a clip, not a bow, not a headband, not two ponytails or a braid...ONE PONYTAIL.  And for a little lady who cannot speak, she sure does know how to get that point across.  She holds her one finger up (very strongly I might add...which basically is yelling in sign language) and then points to the top of her head.

So I have officially made the ponytail a REWARD.  When we go downstairs for breakfast, I say "if you keep your hands to yourself, you can have a ponytail for school!".  And she claps and laughs and giggles.

So last week marked the first day with no ponytail...she started with a gentle touch on her sisters leg, to which the 4 year old screams "DON'T TOUCH ME!" (remember when you were little and your little sister or brother poked their finger as close as they could to you without actually touching you and they said things like "I'm not touching you, I'm not touching you"...well it is pretty much like that)  Then I say, Hailey hands to yourself so you can have your ponytail.  So then she ups the anty...I turn my back to put the pan in the dishwasher and she snatches the 4 year olds hair...(ugggg...I hate to have her not earn her reward).  More screaming from the little one and I say, ok...no ponytail.  You can try again tomorrow.

Oh my, the tears that came from her little eyes were heartbreaking...she cried and cried and put her little finger up and pointed to the top of her head and tried to guide my hand to her head.  It was so sad.  I felt awful.  But I held my ground (all while the 4 year old is behind me saying, things like "you shouldn't have touched me"...which by the way is NOT helping!!).

No Ponytail.

The world was over for her that morning.

I told the teacher when we got to school about the reward and asked her to write a note if she kept her hands to herself and I would do her ponytail after school.

And she did keep her hands to herself...all day.  So she got her ponytail...and we had a very peaceful few mornings where I didn't even have to give her the one warning.

She tried it again today and I was consistent.  She went with no ponytail...

I guess that we shall see if this works for longer than a week...I hope that we make it awhile because I'm running out of ideas here...

Plus, I really like her hair in a ponytail!!